gone wrong

It’s been a little while since my last update. Art has been happening, but sporadically. A very personal and very tragic event took place in my life recently and has completely skewed my view of the present and the future. Nothing is ever as it seems and my foundation is crumbling.

Guilt is taking hold over me in the form of various projects I have not completed, like the hockey helmet for my brother-in-law, the painting of a Greece photo I wanted to do… Personal blog-writing is difficult for me; I long to be completely open to the world about my feelings but fear the consequences. Lately writing has been extremely hard to get started on. I will have to make an effort to try and live through my art, though I feel like I’m really having to push myself to do anything.

I’ve completed one painting since my last post and recently began sketching out another. I will make an effort to post pictures of these when I get a chance. The husband and I are discussing a new camera which will hopefully prove inspiring; lately I have been enhancing and editing photos from trips we’ve taken and I quite enjoy it. Every once in awhile I even take a nice photo or two myself.

I wonder how I got to where I am today, how I ended up so far from where I wanted to be. I wish I had more patience, more endurance, more courage. Autumn is coming and though I love the color and crisp air it brings, the days are dragging and I feel like sleeping through them. I am not looking forward to holidays as I once did. The coming of the cold and the winter instills fear and dread on me. Wake me up when September ends.


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